Day 550: Ishpeming Fleming

Laetitia and her group left the Keweenaw Peninsula and drove east to Craig Lake State Park for a hike. Afterward they went kayaking in Sawyer Lake.

At happy hour that afternoon at a local Ishpeming, Michigan drinking establishment, Laetitia sat at the bar and watched a young man move through the crowd, talking to all the women who would listen about his favorite subject, himself. His line was that he was a former CIA operative who had to retire because of a wound received in the line of duty. He was going to be an author writing James-Bond-style thrillers that were thinly veiled accounts of his adventures with the “Company.”

As Laetitia watched and listened, the bartender whispered from behind her, “Dan tries this line on all the ladies that come in here. Some of them buy it for a while, but eventually most of them wise up. He was away from here for several years, but he wasn’t in the CIA. He was waiting tables over in Escanaba. He consistently flunked English when he was in high school, so it’s doubtful he will turn those adventures that he never had into a novel.” Laetitia smiled and thanked the bartender for his warning.

Since the plan of young Dan from Ishpeming
To pen thrillers like Ian Fleming
Of adventures at night
Means that he’ll have to write
‘Tis likely his prospects are dimming.

Day 120: Last Night in Paradise

For their last day in Hawaii, before moving on to Alaska, most of Laetitia’s group wanted to go shopping. Some went to elegant shops for clothing and beachwear, but others went to Hilo Hattie’s looking for bargains. In the evening, they came early for happy hour and had drinks for several hours before having a late dinner. It was the last evening in “paradise,” and Mike, a rancher from Montana, Daphne, an office manager from New Jersey, and Clem, a retiree from Vermont, were desperate to have one last fling before going home, providing Laetitia with material for three limericks.

Young Mike from Montana’s Big Sky land
Cruised beach bars as he tried to beguile and
Entice young wahines
With double martinis
To wed him and leave the Big Island.

When Daphne from near Perth Amboy
Came to visit Hawaii for poi
She escaped her bikini
Just like old Houdini
When seduced by a beachcomber’s ploy.

Old Clem from near Ticklenaked Pond
Viewed himself as a senior James Bond
On Hawaiian adventures
‘Til he lost his dentures
As he tried to make time with a blonde.